On Sharks, Praying, and almost dying AGAIN...

Well I promised another story about a week ago so here it is... Last week I wrote about how I almost drowned in the ocean. That same ocean holds a few more stories about me. Same trip, September 1990 on my Honeymoon. Randy and I had an ocean view Hotel Room, like the beach was just feet away from our balcony. During the morning after our first night there we had devotionals then we were praying together at the foot of the bed. To be honest HE was praying *I* was too fascinated with the view out side our windows. I tried really hard to focus, truly I did BUT the great out doors just kept calling me... In between bowing my head and keeping a vigilant eye on the ocean something or several somethings caught my eye. Keep in mind, Randy had traveled alllll over the country, while I had hardly been out of my own back yard. Sure we took camping trips and even went to FL a few times when I was a child but that doesnt count cuz I dont remember it. SO that being said as I looked out into the vast ocean what do I see but a group of SHARKS !! I mean like seven or eight of them. I became VERY alarmed for the people that were swimming in the ocean not far from these vicious creatures. But Randy unlike ME was praying, head bowed, eyes closed, unaware that *I* was feeling guilt ridden because I just could not focus on praying ~ and then I started feeling scared for those people and I felt I had a duty to interrupt Randy and tell him we had some people to go save. Seriously ! So there I was kneeling at the foot of the bed NOT praying and in fact I was worrying. Eventually my conscience got the best of me and I started tugging on Randys arm like a two year old. (lol) "Randy, Randy sorry but LOOK out the window, there are SHARKS out there..." He stops praying and being the dutiful husband looks out the window, looks back at me with a look as if to say "Really, Tiff ?" then he smiles his best "I'm trying not to patronize you but thats what I'm about to do, smile" and says "Tiff, hunny, those are NOT sharks, they are DOLPHINS !" I looked again and I said something like "But they have FINS and they are BIG, are you sure those people are safe ?" HE had seen enough oceans in enough states to be confident that they were in fact Dolphins. After a moment or two he had me all calmed down, and I even finished praying but still kept my eyes peeled in case a scene from Jaws started taking place on the beach... Later that morning we went down to the beach and after some convincing he coaxed me into the water and out to where those 'sharks' were waiting to feed on poor innocent people. To my amazement and child like wonder, he was right, there we stood surrounded by beautiful DOLPHINS. =) ~This is all I have time for at the moment~ I will pick up with my 2nd 'near death experience' where Randy once again saved my life, some other time. (like, he said I was DEAD, no pulse, no breathing, unresponsive pupils DEAD for several minutes) The ONLY thing I recall was what I saw before I went down (which I will share later) and then as if in a dense fog or deep sleep I heard a voice echoing ~it was almost as if I were in a cave or a tunnel and the voice was bouncing off the walls~ and this voice said "TIFF, TIFF dont leave me ! PLEASE TIFF !! Dont leave me !!!" then I heard, or maybe *thought* (I'll never know for sure) "Go back to him, Come back to me, Go back to him" then I was awake. No clue where I was, and I didnt even know my own name for a moment or two. There was a paramedic in my face looking very concerned and then there was my Randy, looking very relieved with tears streaming down his face, and it registered "I just died -or almost died- and he saved my life AGAIN..." I may not have known my own name in that moment but I knew someone LOVED me and I knew that I loved HIM and I knew somehow everything would be OK, but first, I needed to figure out what the heck happened... To Be Continued =)

Going topless at Virgina Beach is frowned upon, apparently...

I've been hesitant to post again mostly because I'm not getting much feed back... Y'all have been telling me for YEARS to make a blog or write a book. Its a pretty humbling thing to put your 'stuff' out there. You wait, you wonder, you second guess. To my faithful friends and family THANK YOU for your feed back !! Last night Randy of all people all but begged me to post something else. "But you LIVE with me, you know all my stories, you finish my sentences, I'm just a wife and Mom and I'm oh so boring." He said "Oh but I've forgotten them and you are funny, well written, inspiring, and people deserve to hear this stuff whether they comment you or not, its FUNNY. You have almost have 600 views 'someone' or 'someone(s)' is reading this." SO for my Randy here's another few short stories about "Those things I do." =) Its a sunny day in September of 1990 Virgina Beach Virgina. I am on my honey moon. Randy and I purchased a boogie board. While he was out catching waves I was content to video him and catch me some rays. At some point he convinced me to give it a try. Two problems with this 1.) I DON'T swim. 2.) I HATE HATE HATE getting my face wet. But being the supportive, happy go lucky, wanting to make my hew groom happy, wife that I was I said I'd give it a try. And I was hooked. It was a BLAST, I didn't have the skill he did and I looked like a fish out of water on that board that I clung to for dear life, but I didn't care it was fun ! My BFF at the time (Chris) had loaned me her bikini. At some point in the day I went and changed out of my one piece and into this cute neon pink, orange, and black 2 piece. Yes, once upon a time I was not old, and fat, and didn't even know what cellulite was ! lol Randy stayed in the room and I headed back out, with my new friend the boogie board. After catching a particularly large wave, upon washing onto the shore, I excitedly looked up at our hotel window to see if Randy had seen, but of course he had not. I laid there for a few minutes propped up just looking around and basking in my new found talent. After a minute or 2 a little girl walked by me and she couldn't seem to take her eyes off me. I thought it was weird but I just smiled. Next thing I know her mom walked over in a huff and yanked her away from me, giving me a nasty look. "Sheeesh whats her problem" I wondered. I decided it was time to stand up. As I did so to my utter horror I realized my bikini top had worked its way down to my WAIST and there were my 'girls' just hanging out for alllll the world to see. I had been lying there propped up on my elbows for MINUTES and no one bothered to tell me. THEN all the stares I had been getting made sense. I thought people were just impressed with my 'Mad Boogie Board Skills' NOPE they were staring at my girls in all their glory... Again I say "Only Me" !! I pulled my top up, RAN to get my towel, then RAN to our hotel room and dissolved into tears as I told Randy my sob story. To his credit he didn't laugh... at first ! Haha Fast forward same trip to a couple days later. Against my better judgment Randy convinced me to walk out much farther into the water than I was comfortable with. There we stood letting wave after wave lift us and make us feel as if we were floating. It was SO cool, there were even dolphins swimming aruond us. By the time I realized how far out we had drifted it was too late. We both looked up in time to see a tsunami type wave heading right at us picking up size and speed by the second. I was terrified to say the least. Randy the ever present voice of reason (seriously hes THE BEST person to have around in a crisis.) told me he loved me and said "Its gonna be OK heres what we are gonna do." You see HE could have easily swam up to the shore and avoided the wave but as I said earlier I DO NOT SWIM. I HONESTLY before God thought I was going to die. I can not stress the size of this wave getting bigger and stronger as it made its way towards us. This is a good time to mention that it was HURRICANE season, and someone had DIED in the ocean just the day before... Did I mention I cant swim ? Any way back to what happened. I just kept murmuring "I love you, I'm so sorry, I dont want to die..." Randy said "Look at me Tiffany, you ARE going to be OK and heres what WE are going to do." He showed me how to lock arms with him using both our hands to grip each others forearms. Then he said and I'll NEVER forget this "That wave IS coming and we ARE going to get hit and I KNOW you are afraid BUT I.WILL.NOT.LET.YOU.GO.NO.MATTER.WHAT." Keep in mind this all happened in probably less than a minute. I told him something like but YOU can swim for it... He shut me up saying again that I would be OK and he'll be holding me the entire time. So there we stood in the deep blue ocean watching this tidal wave of impending doom... When it was almost upon us he said "Ready ? Now take a DEEP breath, and remember I'm not letting go no matter what." I didn't have time to reply. Then next thing I knew I was on the bottom of the ocean floor. I was being pulled by the under current. "So THIS is what its like to die" I thought and I also thought about the poor soul that had just drown the very same way days before. As I was being thrown about feeling scrapes and cuts forming on my belly and legs the most MIRACULOUS thing happened. I felt Randy ON TOP of me. For a brief second I thought he thought he was being funny. I cant explain it, such confidence and faith I had in him that he was in fact going to save me that I thought he on purpose landed on me. Next thing I know I'm being lifted straight out of the water. Upon finding my footing you'd think I threw my arms around Randy and thanked him properly for saving me. Sadly that's NOT what I did. I YELLED at him for playing a joke on me and laying on top of me when clearly I was terrified and thought I was gonna die. He was like "WHAT ?? I just saved your life that wave THREW me on top of you !!" I dissolved into a hot mess of tears again, profusely apologized, and spend the rest of the day reflecting on what 'almost' happened... So to my Hero Randy, I hope you enjoyed this and THANK YOU again for saving my life, for putting MY needs, my very LIFE, before your own. THANK YOU for never letting go, both then, and the many times on this our Journey of 21 years of marriage, when letting go would have been So.Much.Easier... And THANK YOU for saving my life not once but TWICE. More on that story some other day. I hope you enjoyed this and I'll bet you too have a 'hero' in your life to be eternally grateful to/for. If so please share with me I'd love to hear YOUR story of survival ! =) Here's a hint about my next blog... "On Sharks, Praying, and almost dying, AGAIN"

"Catching your kids doing something GOOD"

My day did not start out too well. We've been having problems with our garage door closing. Well, this morning I could NOT for the life of me open it. SO I set my phone down on the back of the van and told my self "OK.Lets.Do.This.Thing." Three or four minutes later I had it open. But guess what ? Yep, I LEFT my phone on the back of my van, of course cuz that's how I roll, and I took off. So i get to work and call Kyle who was of course still sleeping. As Kyle was having yet another sleep over (cuz he is SPOILED that way :)I told the guys lights out at 2:30 and from there they fall asleep when they fall asleep. Groggy and tired he answered his phone. I said "Kyle SO sorry to wake you but I have a problem." "Whats wrong Mom ?" I told him what I'd done and asked him to please get dressed and go look for my phone, I again said I'm sorry but it may even be in the street. Now although my kids are good natured (hmm spell check tells me that's not a word, but CLEARLY I used it in a sentence lol) most of the time, NO ONE wants to get a phone call telling them to get dressed go out in the cold and search for something ESPECIALLY when they were asleep. But you know what he said ? "Its OK Mom, I'll find it." No grumbling, no attitude, just a willingness to help his poor Mom out. I post things like this that may make some of you roll your eyes and say *not again* and that's OK but there is a REASON I do this. Randy and I have a philosophy, a mission if you will when it comes to raising our kids it is simply this "Catch your children doing something GOOD and praise them for it." Its EASY to find fault, nag, gripe, complain, correct, pick at... but we have a responsibility to built our kids up, encourage, praise, and LOVE them like there's no tomorrow. Shedding light on good behavior causes them to want to repeat said good behavior. Again my kids are NOT perfect, but they do some pretty perfect things and you bet cha Randy and I are gonna keep "Catching that good behavior" no matter how old they get. So here's my challenge to YOU my friends that are parents, how bout you catch YOU kids doing something good and tell them... Then let me know how it goes ! There maybe many of you who already do this and if so GREAT keep it up because its just as important, actually more so, as feeding and sheltering them. The rewards are 10 fold the effort you may have to put in to find that good behavior ~ but it IS there to be found !! It was one week ago today that Kyle made a sincere commitment to God and us his family to step up his Spiritual life and OH how proud it makes me to say he has delivered in spades ! Thanx for reading... ♥ And in case you're wondering my Kyle did in deed find the phone, in the street ~ he's magic that way ! =)

The craziest things happen to me...

OK its no secret I'm a magnet for 'oh its weird, craZy, unbelievable...? Then it HAS to happen to Tiffany Ratliff' Seriously. Like its a law or something. I've been told I could and should write a book about all the stuff that I do, or say, or have happen to me, or witness... but for now this blog will have to suffice. 'Sides I'm getting old and I can hardly remember to remind my self to eat let alone something that happened yesterday. Haha OK so I'm exaggerating a tad but these stories that I'm about to share -spread out over time- are totally NOT exaggerated. Names and places may be changed to protect the innocent ~ sorry couldnt help my self. OK back to the story at hand. MOST of these things happen to me at the work place. Like the time when working as a waitress I asked my customer "Would you like you hie peated ?" and he said something like "What ever you say sugar..." and I walked away red in the face and promptly returned with his PIE HEATED. Or the time when working with Randy in Troy. This 'person' walked in asking me for a job application. Well this was a very special kind of person. It was a man dressed in FULL ON D.R.A.G. with makeup, and a dress, and a wig, and high heals that incidentally caused him to have this very odd awkward walk. Mind you this was 1990 when such sightings were an acceptation and not the norm. And after all I was only 20, yes I'll blame my age on my reaction. Which was to duck underneath my desk and try to pull my self together. When this attempt failed I then reached my hand up onto my desk feeling around for my phone and I called up another girl to help me 'deal with something' Now this poor guy, (or do you say girl ?) who was patiently waiting for a job app (which of course I had NO idea where they were kept or believe me I'd have grabbed it and sent him on his way) SAW me duck under said desk and then SAW me feeling around for the phone, and then HEARD me try to stifle laughter. It wasnt so much that I was making fun of him, really, it was just the fact that he came in looking like the thought he could pull this off. Like, ehhh happens every day, lets just stop in to this place and expect them to take me seriously as I ask for employment. Never mind that he had a run in his hose, fake eyelashes one of which was fluttering around threatening to fall off, and RED RED lipstick smeared seemingly every where BUT his lips, and then there were the fake nails, but I digress... Once my co-worker made it up to me I tried to bolt, but she made me stay with her while she too tried and failed to speak to this person with out loosing it. Eventually I did make a run for it, into the bathroom where I stood laughing so hard that tears were streaming down my face. Once he was gone I got a nice lecture/threat something about "If you EVER do that to me again..." Fast forward 20 some odd years to my present place of employment. I sell electronic cigarettes. On display as part of our decor my manager has a decent sized jar filled with all different colors of USED filters. He even sealed off the top of it with some packaging tape. I'd like to say this deterred people from trying to take them. But nope. Apparently when you think something may be FREE it doesnt matter what it is, you just want handfuls of them. And just last night I witnessed 2 people grab a few and say "ohh these is free !" and the other person said "What is they ? What you gonna do with 'em ?" I intervened at this point and said "Ladies those are used filters, on display for a decoration..." They promptly dropped them back in the jar and ran off. One particular lady upon seeing the jar walked over to me and said something like "I got my kit down somewhere(s) else, so am I supposed to frow away my useded filters in that jar ?" You cant make this stuff up people remember I'm a MAGNET for these kinds of situations. While I was tempted to say something like "Oh yes lady from Saginaw I think its perfectly reasonable to ask you to drive to Flint to "FROW" away your garbage." But I didnt, I smiled and said "No of course not, that jar is just on display to show our variety of filters, you know, like for a decoration." And she looked at me and said "Oh so I should put mine(s) in a jar too ?" REALLY ?? You'll be happy to know that again I bit my tongue and said "No hun, you just throw them away in your OWN garbage..." Here is a picture of the jar...

I'll add to this over time, depending upon YOUR feed back...or lack there of ! =)